When it comes to traveling, I am lucky enough to have done my fair share. By the age of 24, I had lived in Buenos Aires, the Falklands, Salamanca, Barcelona, Bath and Manchester and spent time in South America and Africa. These trips were hugely formative and I am so grateful for having had the opportunity to do so (and especially for my parents bank account for the occasional top-up). However my recent trip to Vietnam and Cambodia, during which I cycled 500km for Parkinson’s UK, was an entirely new type of experience and adventure, which opened my eyes in many ways.

Of course, there were many highlights to the trip: the fantastic scenery, the amazing food, the cycling, the sunshine, etc. But what really made it was the people. The people we travelled with, but also the people we met along the way. 

Our group was composed of over 30 individuals ranging between 20 and 66 years old. Over the 12 day trip, I got to spend time with each and every one of them, from the cycling to the water stops via the dinners and sightseeing tours. A mini social experiment of sorts, in which I learnt a lot about myself, others and the human ability to connect.

I realized half way through our trip that I hadn’t been in similar social conditions since high school or university: a group of strangers coming together to spend every waking second in each others company. And what a group it was. A bunch of extremely positive, upbeat, happy people that were brought together with the common objective of giving their time, money and energy to help others. Each and every person had a different background, a different story, and a different reason for engaging in the adventure. Old, young, female, male, gay, straight, etc. All of us came together as a unit and formed great bonds throughout the trip.

Over the first few days, we slowly began to meet each other, and started to connect between ourselves. People started to open up, to share their experiences, backgrounds and opinions with the group. Throughout the 12 days, we discovered more and more about every single person, our personalities, behaviors and perceptions.

I quickly learnt to lose any expectation or judgement about anyone. When we meet someone, we instantly form a script, a picture and an idea of what that person is like, about their life and who they are. However every single person on the trip blew me away. People surprised me in many ways, and I learnt that each individual is special in their own unique way. As one person wrote upon his return to the UK: “Thank You to all of you for rejuvenating my belief in humankind.. You are all outstanding people.”

However the human connections we developed were not simply between ourselves. Through our cycling, we met hundreds if not thousands of people along the way. Children gathered at the sides of the roads, screaming Hello, shouting and smiling at us passing by. Their parents by their sides would smile, beaming genuine love and interest. Many people stopped to take pictures of the people, the children, and to interact with them, despite everyones limited knowledge of the others’ language. 

Simply by making eye contact, smiling and saying hello, we were able to connect with other human beings along the way. We were able to feel a bond, a connection, a similar human spirit. And we were able to send and receive genuine love without using words.

I strongly believe that everyone of us is dying to connect with others. When we walk on the street, all of us have the urge to reach out to those around us. It is natural. It is what we are designed to do. However in our society and our big city lives we have forgotten this. How many of us look at the ground, avoid the gaze of others as much as possible? When was the last time you met anyone on the tube? People are lacking that feeling of connectedness and love. A simple smile and eye contact is enough to change that. 

This trip has opened my eyes in many ways. I have understood how easy it is to connect with others once you release any expectation or pre-conceived opinions on people. I have realized how important it is to me to connect with everyone I meet, and to allow all kinds of people into my life. I have reinforced my belief that everyone is special, and has something unique and wonderful to offer the world. And above all, I have discovered the importance of a smile, the importance of making eye contact, and the importance of saying hello.

Will Pike – November 2012

Amazing positive shifts and changes are happening around the planet.

If one is lacking self-Love as a man, what does it then take to overcome these challenges in life? And how do addictions come into play as a way of coping with life for some men?

We need to look no further, Obama is the first president winning both the popular and electoral vote majorities and to sign a pro-LGBT bill. The first president to speak out in support of the freedom to marry, and the president who made open service in USA armed forces for gays and lesbians possible, LGBT Americans have won a major victory and with that a strong message was sent to the entire world.

It is a fact and scientifically proven that empowered individuals that are in touch with their deepest self, their inner feelings and their true love operate at much higher vibrational levels. Individuals who are at this level have the capability to shift from “Love of Power” to “Power of Love”. Obama, the USA re-elected a president is one of the kind of individuals I am talking about. The first president that endorsed gay marriage, a man who knows we are all love, we are all one, a man who used the Power of Love to make all of it to happen.

This is a giant leap for humanity, a strong message that we are all Love was sent to the entire world. It is a stepping stone towards creating a world that is free from limited beliefs, free from judgement, and is accepting for all mankind.

We are love by default, we just need to remember it, and how do we do this, well I have been on this journey from the moment I was born and the more I feel present right not the more I Love.

For me living a wonderful life is about staying open through the changes and the difficult times. It is about keeping going and consistently sticking to my goals knowing that I am growing as I do so.

Beliefs about Love can hinder our own well being as well to those around us. The above would have not been possible if Obama did not belief in equality, in love for all mankind, etc.  It is essential to understand ourselves at deeper level, explore the deep hurts that we are unable to let go, release and learn to accept those who hurt you and those you hurt.

When we connect with our hearts and we expand our sense of freedom, trust and joy. We start to radiate our understanding and knowing of Love, we are opening the way to becoming what we already are: Love

Coming from a much closed minded community, for many years i lived in fear, I lacked the courage, and the self-belief needed to love myself resulting in a single life that had its upsides but was ultimately very lonely for long periods of time. This went on for many years until at a defining moment, when I found the strength to take life back in my own hands. I did something about it when the status quo became just too painful. I engaged in a wide variety of self-development programs and courses to develop my skills, confidence and healing my own life, I took the plunge and this is what I did:

• I find out the BIG WHAT that was holding me back from being me
• Become comfortable and confident in who I am as a man
• Took small daily actions to unleash my potential
• Became clear about my limited beliefs and took actions to find new ones
• Learn the most effective tools to self-love, acceptance and opening my heart

Now I thrive in all areas of my life as i guide men into becoming confident men too.

Through my personal journey of letting go of the deep hurts I found Love for myself, I started to speak my truth about Love and able to see the Love in others and receive it too. The question i have for you is, how much has deep hurt cost you so far?

I entered a journey of experience being love in profound new ways, I went through a four-step process acceptance, identify, mobilize, and release the painful memories and life-damaging beliefs that are at the root of many emotional and physical health problems. The fourth steps helped me opening my heart to true love flowing into me.

If you too relate to the above, are experiencing lacks of self-love and are at stage of your life where you want to take life back into your own hands, than the new and very unique Love2Loveworkshop held on the 1st of December is the one to help you unleash the authentic man within. Only number of tickets available, Book yours now, click HERE!

Four more years. This powerful sentence, a record breaking tweet sent by Barack Obama and re-tweeted nearly a million times, has headlined newspapers around the world. These three words have become a symbol for hope, change, and freedom.

As the results of the 2012 US Presidential election were announced, you could practically hear the sigh of relief emanating from social networks and newspapers around the world. Relief that the voters had chosen to put their trust once again in Barack Obama, giving the Democrats the keys to the White House for another term.

For some, Obama was the lesser of two evils. But for me and for many people I know, he symbolises much more. He symbolises progress, the march of freedom, of equal rights, of social equality and democracy. He symbolises the inclusion of all minorities; as he said himself “It doesn’t matter whether you’re black or white or Hispanic or Asian or Native American or young or old or rich or poor, abled, disabled, gay or straight. You can make it (here) in America if you’re willing to try.”

This election was a first for many things. It was the first time a black President was re-elected to the White House. It was the first time an open supporter of gay rights was voted in. It was the first time that any President mentioned the word “gay” in a presidential victory speech. And for the first time on the same night, three states voted in favour of gay marriage and a fourth state made steps towards gay equality by rejecting an appeal to ban  it.

This series of first symbolises a new beginning and an important victory for gay rights campaigners across the States and as a repercussion: across the globe. Mankind has made a step into the future, a future in which everyone has the right to love and to marry the one they love, regardless of gender or sexuality. A small victory in global terms, but an important one nonetheless.

This election really has raised hope for many people, and confirmed that although divided, the US favours the path of democracy, freedom and equality. Of course, there is a lot of work to be done. Obama must overcome the political gridlock that is occurring and is putting a break on his promised plans. The next two years will be crucial for making the most of his time in the office, and staying true to the expectations he has set.

Many cynics will try and put a damper on the elections and their message. But many will refuse to focus on the negative, the fears, the doubts. Instead, they will find inspiration and hope in the results of the elections. And excitement, that indeed “the best is yet to come.”

Will Pike – November 2012

On my recent visit to Macedonia for my mother’s 78thbirthday I found myself in a situation that was extremely challenging both emotionally and mentally. For the sake of the love, respect and not wanting to disappoint my family and people I love and care about I ended up setting myself into an autopilot mode by doing things that were expected of me and letting myself go with the flow.  I could not help but notice the changes in people’s behaviour around me as well as the anger that was being build inside of me. Whilst there were positive feeling being generated in the actions I was doing that were making other people happy, bit by bit I started to neglect my own wants and needs, as the time went on this started to build into more frustration and anger.

Doing things for others for sure is rewarding, ignoring our own needs, not listening to our own inner voice and not allowing ourselves to be who we actually are is NOT. Living in a straight men’s world where everyone is expecting you to be a well behaved, a respected son and a family guy if not managed properly can led to so much anger being stored inside of you.

How many of you have been told that anger is inappropriate?  It’s not good to be angry.  And so we’ve learned to ignore our feelings of anger, push them down, suppress them, and pretend they don’t exist.  In the long run, I realised that’s not any healthier for you than expressing your anger inappropriately. I now completely understand.  Having left my culture I made a decision a long time ago to stop being angry at my family, at the macho guys at school who bullied me for spending my time with girls and not playing football with them, at all of the people who started the war in former Yugoslavia that led me to loose friends, family and being forced to flee the country I grew up and new to be my own (at that time), at employers and friends who simply did not appreciate the hard work I put over the years. It was serving no one.

What I did not realize is that although I stopped expressing anger, I was also not honestly acknowledging how I felt, and so I was actually just storing the anger in my body.

One of the things I have learned through experience, working with healers, spiritual teachers, with many of my friends and helping clients move through relationship issues is that stored anger shows up in our life in many ways.  Often people who struggle with addiction, especially alcoholism have repressed anger.  Chronic pain has also proven to reveal hidden and stored anger.

Repressed anger is often disguised and sometimes it takes working through other emotions to arrive at the anger.

I’ve also discovered in both my personal and professional path that rather than acknowledging and expressing the anger we feel at other people, experiences, and life in general, we turn those heavy emotions inward and begin to blame ourselves, judge our feelings, and begin to want to justify or make sense of the feelings that dare to rise up and call our attentions. So we learn, to hide them, mask them, make excuses for them, and turn more judgement and pain inward at our own shortcomings and failings. I was the first to tell you, “ I’m not angry.” I would just as quickly jump in and justify why I should NOT feel angry, and make sense of the situation and talk myself right out of feeling what was real for me.  I had every right to be mad, and yet at some level, I did not believe that I did.  By the way, this did not stop the feelings from showing up.  I just got really good at “making sense” of it all – and totally dis empowering my real feelings and myself in the process.

Thank goodness, the work I have done over the years is helping me each time I go back to my roots, family and culture.  I have learned how to safely and quickly address what’s really causing the show of feelings, giving a voice to them, and letting go of the judgement and blame we tend to hold.

Addressing and releasing not only anger but other emotions and feelings that may be masking the real feelings of anger that you are holding is your first step.

It is your chance to move through the heavy, energetic emotions that are interfering with your happiness, and your living the life that you really want to be experiencing.

What I have found is that through combination of Chakra Healing, Life Coaching and tapping i work with clients on releasing the energy, the thoughts, the meta programming that causes this anger, it allows for more joy to come in.  You move the old, stuck, stagnant energy out of your system and make room for more of the new positive thoughts and energy to fill you.

If you are feeling stuck, lost or hopeless,

If you are at a crossroads and don’t know which way to turn,

If you are generally unhappy and just don’t know why,

If you know you want to make a change, and just cannot shift,

If you are chronically having accidents or experiencing pain and discomfort,

There’s a strong possibility that there is some stored, stuck, unexpressed anger (or other emotion) in your body, in your subconscious, in your energy body.  So get in touch as I would love for you to be anger free, you will be free to move forward to create the life and relationships you desire and to be all that you imagine.

To your love and joy,

Tony J Selimi ©HealOneSelf